Life is complex, we all heard that before. Life is never black and white, we heard that before, too. There are so many shades in between those black and white, you will loose count. But somehow, such statements are just empty words, unless you are standing face to face with reality, that shows you the rainbow, the one between black and white. And you realize, that not all good is good and not all evil is really evil. It all about where you stand when the brick hits you.
March, 11, 2011. Already the numbers 11 look ominous, don't you think? And look what has happened on that day! So much suffering, pain, sorrow. The world will never forget March, 11, 2011.
I will never forget this day, either. But I will celebrate. No, not because I'm a cinic, but because this day has become the happiest day of my life. The day when everything fell into place, like pieces of a puzzle (and I have never been good at puzzles, let me tell you). The day when my son was born. The day when he finally came out to meet me, to be taken in my arms, to sleep close to me. The day when I could stroke his head not through the taught skin of my belly, but without any barriers between us. The day when he complained about being disturbed in the warm, dark, cosy, if somewhat smallish space he was accomodating the last almost 9 months and being pulled out into cold, bright light. He was not pleased, we all understood that, and he couldn't wait to tell us about it. But the next day – an angel smile. They say the smile of a newborn is nothing else than a reflex, but I don't care. I will always think this smile was FOR ME. Becase he was happy to be finally here, close to me.
My heart bleeds for all the people who lost their loved ones and their homes on this day. Their lives has changed completely then. My life changed, too, and some things will never be the same.
But I will celebrate this day as a start of a new life, the day my son was born.